I think my baby bump is becoming more apparent, although it is not quite large enough to be completely unambiguous. Strangers I came across at the conference had different approaches to my belly.
- Women older than me (and presumably mothers) had no problem walking straight up to me, asking when I was due, and how I was feeling.
- Men older than me (and presumably fathers) eyeballed my belly but refrained from any comments. Some resorted to quietly asking a nearby coworker if I was expecting before bringing it up with me.
- Women my age would gently try to bring up the subject just so they could ask how I plan to handle things when the little one is born.
- Men my age seemed rather oblivious to the matter.
On the other hand, the few people I know well that are also in attendance at this conference have all been very protective of me. One told me that if I needed anything from the store, etc., I should let him know and he would be happy to fetch it for me. Another made sure to check in on my evening plans such that I never had to walk in the dark by myself (we are staying at the same hotel). Yet another snooped out the healthiest food sources in the conference center and gave me heads up about it. One kept worrying that I am not getting enough rest. When walking with me, all would choose the paths that preferred escalators/elevators to stairs, all offered to fetch me water, and all were in awe at my ability to consume more food then them ;)
Attending the conference while pregnant is certainly an interesting experience, with all the potential employers there to see my baby bump. I figure it should not be detrimental to my job search in a few years though, since I really don't think I want to work for an employer who would count having a family against me in the first place.
The perverse incentives of academia
6 years ago
5 comments:
Congratulations on your pregnancy. I hope to be following your path not too long from now, and I look forward to hearing how things progress for you. Good luck!
It sounds like the folks you know there are a good group. Does the protective behavior come mostly from those with or without children?
You have awesome colleagues!
When my two good friends were getting really big this summer, random strangers would come up to them and touch their bellies. Without asking. I would FREAK if someone did that to me! So, be careful out there ;)
I'm glad you have such a supportive network! How did the rest of the conference go?
II - Thanks! I wondered if the readers would be interested in me sharing about my pregnancy, so I am glad you find it useful!
Albatross - it helps that all kinds of colleagues gather at this conference: from school, my current place of work, etc. I think the parents are the ones that knew best what would be helful (after all, they have some idea about what my body is going through). Not all of the non-parents knew how to be accommodating, although most tried to be helpful.
Cath - I think I too would freak out if someone touched my belly. However, since most people I come across at work are male, I think the usual boundaries should protect me ;)
UR - the rest of the conference went really well, but I am glad to be back home!
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